Becoming who you were meant to be

Alice Tomkinson, 5th Feb 2018
Tags: Life Blog Challenges Dreams Individuality People's opinions

Have you ever heard about how a seed becomes a flower? 

Ok, not the most enthralling of sentences, but stay with me. Whatever your circumstances are, I think this is something you will want to hear.

You see, a seed goes through trauma, a trauma that, when looking at a beautiful flower in the soil, amongst the other pretty flowers, you don’t tend to comprehend.

All a seed can do, is...well...start to be noticed.

Seeds, when uprooted from their safe and comfortable pot, get shoved into a dark, wet, and heavy ground. There is no light, or room to move, and it's lonely, isolated and unknown. All a seed can do, is...well...start to be noticed.
 
I'm writing this on the day Kylie Jenner, the younger generation’s queen, announced the birth of her baby girl.

My Twitter feed went crazy with tweets and likes from many young women applauding her desire for privacy, her glammed up pregnancy clips, emotional video and pregnant selfies.

Of course I’m very happy for her, and I am not in any way judging her decisions, photos and video clips, in fact I applaud her attempt to break the celebrity norm. But what shocked me most, was the total hysteria from young women my age and younger, absolutely in awe of her personal life, her announcement and her journey.

I wonder how many times, we as young women, cling on to celebrities that show a part of us we wish we were, or a lifestyle we wish we had, before admiring and celebrating our own.

I wonder how long we will live in other women’s stories, before we create the beautiful strength of our own stories.

I wonder how long we will live in other women’s stories, before we create the beautiful strength of our own story. 

You see this seed, when trapped in the isolation of its environment, fights through the darkness, and despite the discomfort, it starts cracking, breaking and opening its insides.

It looks messy, ugly, unfiltered and totally chaotic. Hey! Not something we want to be associated with in this society, or our own lives.

Its guts are everywhere, until finally it grows just enough strength to rise up, to start its true existence – its true potential. 

It fights through the darkness just enough to break through the soil, the heaviness, weight, cold, and the unknown, until it reaches the light, finds its roots and begins to grow and blossom.

The people with the biggest strength have the biggest battles.

Has anyone ever told you that perhaps, the most powerful of souls, experience the biggest pain? That the people with the biggest strength have the biggest battles?

Just like that little seed, this will always be you and me, put into this sometimes dark and isolating place called life. 

We get put into circumstances that, more often than not, make us feel like we’re too small, too lost, and too afraid.

Image Credit: tenor

So, we have a choice. We have a choice to fight this battle as the younger generation, amongst friends and enemies, teachers and parents, social media and society.

We can choose to make a mess, to risk looking ugly and different, to feel the weight of the world and rise above it.

We can choose to make a mess, to risk looking ugly and different, to feel the weight of the world and rise above it.

I know how it feels to look around and feel like you have to be a certain way. You have to achieve a certain goal, you have to ‘do this and do that, and think this and think that’, and if you do all that, you’ll be great. You might just get that place in sixth form, that degree, that job, or that husband.

Let me tell you, only you can choose the destiny of your life, and that starts by trusting that you’ve been created to make a mess, to make mistakes, to make choices, to take risks, to root yourself and push past the soil. To push past the disappointments and heartbreaks, past the opinions, past the right and wrong, and past the world’s views, to root yourself and flourish.

You were always destined to be more, to see more, to bring more to the world, to create the most empowering story.

You were always destined to be more, to see more, to bring more to the world, to create the most empowering story.

So, can I just encourage you, whatever your circumstances, no matter how confusing life may feel right now as a young woman, you are a seed, and a seed goes through trauma before it stands firm. Before it wears its crown as a beautiful flower, it has to go through the battle that lies ahead.

Right now, on this cold February morning, I’ll raise my half-drunk coffee to Kylie Jenner and her new arrival, but mostly, I’ll raise it to you, who has everything within you, entrusted to you, and given to you by God – to make a mess, to push past the weight and burden of life, and to live out the future you’ve always dreamed of.